1-2-3 Communication is actually really simple, and we still suck at it.

Ok, I have to confess something, I have a communication problem. Anyone who knows me probably knows what it is and if you don't you could just look into my high school yearbook and see I was voted "most talkative" in my class (true story). Not best personality, not most likely to succeed...most talkative. To temper this a little bit I am not one of those over the top people who are so talkative you don't want to be around them, I just am someone who is outgoing and rambles more than I should.

As I have got older I have come to find that when I right I am much less of a rambler because writing slows me down and allows me to think clearly and get my point across without all the extra junk. For example, a person could read this blog in a few minutes, but if they were sitting with me it would probably be a 15 minute conversation. Because of this I have used writing as my preferred method of important communication and have come to realize that communication can seem complex but it is stunningly simple. Every, time you open your mouth to speak or begin to write a sentence you are always only doing one of three things.

1) Conveying Information.

This is the most common thing you do and it is part of communication that I am terrible at it because ramblers like me share more information than is needed. My english teacher in high school was once asked how long the essay he assigned should be, he said "Anything you write should be like a skirt, long enough to cover the subject matter but short enough to keep it interesting". As Shakespeare said "brevity is the soul of whit".  When conveying information keep it short, clear and concise. The listener usually only wants enough information and nothing more.

2) Requesting Information. (aka ask a question)

Questions are an art form that few people know how to use effectively (I am not great at it either) and much can be said about the many uses of questions. One of the most common mistakes people make when writing or speaking is not asking a question but conveying information and then being quiet and expecting a response. Women are notorious for this (though men certainly do it too). Imagine a girlfriend sitting at dinner with her boyfriend conveying information about her day then ending with the following.

"So then then my sister said how immature I was acting yesterday just because I would not drop what I was doing to help her with the kids....<pause awaiting response>"

Notice above no information or response was requested (it was merely implied that he was supposed to react to what she said with a response of his own). Now this is ok and people do communicate this way (especially women in a group). However, it can sometimes be confusing (especially for men) because they may not know how to respond or what the implied question is. The boyfriend might respond "Man, your sister is a total jerk", when really what she wants is validation that her actions were justified. Wouldn't is be simpler to simply add in a clear question at the end.

"So then then my sister said how immature I was acting yesterday just because I would not drop what I was doing to help her with the kids. Do you think that I was being immature?"

Simple requests for information from another person are polite and helpful to the listener as it clarifies the situation for them and directly communicates your desire for their participation. The norms of communication usually expect the listener to be polite to the a speaker should also be polite to the listener by being clear in their methods of communication. If you want a response from someone you can  "What are your thoughts on XYZ? or "Do you think X is Y?" etc. Never leave a person guessing if you want a response or not. Implied communication is unclear, inefficient and can easily lead to miscommunication.

3) Issuing a Command

Some people are scared of the word "command", if thats the case call it a request. Essentially, you are asking someone to do something and are usually expected to do that in a very polite manner. So in conjunction with #2, there are two ways you can request information. You can either ask a question (What do you think Bob?) or you can issue a command (Bob, let me know what you think). Regardless, commands should be clear, polite and stated rather than implied.

For some reason people (including myself) have a tendency to want to spend all our time conveying information. However, we have to realize the listener only wants as much information as needed and they want to know what they need to do about it which comes from your question or a command. Usually miscommunications happen because people fail to issue clear commands or to ask clear questions.


A Simple Email Template. 

I have found the following email format works really well for me in effectively and efficiently communicating with people.

Hello Bob < note: The email clearly is addressed to someone specifically>
Yesterday after the meeting Mark and I discussed the contract. He was concerned about the terms that included initial finance charges. I worry we might lose the deal if we try to charge him up front. <note: Paragraph 1 conveys information as clearly and to the point as possible>

Please let me know if I can waive the fee for him. <note: put the question or command in a separate line at the end>

- Jacob <note: I put my name...always include your name. Auto signatures are great>

Questions to ponder.

Do I issue clear commands/request?
Do I ask specific questions if something is unclear or if I want information from other person?
When do I usually imply commands or questions?, How can I avoid that?
Do I give just enough information as is needed, or do I give to much?

The Miracle of Google Docs Comments

Most people are very familiar with google docs/drive. The ability to share and collaborate on documents, spreadsheets and slideshows is great but most people don't know about how useful the comments function is. Its a way to cut WAY back on emails and also allows you to have entire meetings and collaborations remotely and on your own time! Here is how it works.

Start with any google Doc or spreadsheet. Share it with whom every you need by clicking the share button and adding people to the document.

After adding in your content highlight content you want to comment on and right click. Then select comment.



At this point a comment box will appear where you can write a comment. Use the @ symbol to tag people's email in the comment. This sends that person an email notifying them they were mentioned in a comment. 

A conversation can then go back and forth using the comments. When the issue being commented on is resolved you simply click the "resolve" button. And you are done. This same functionality can be used with google spreadsheets by right clicking a cell and then clicking comment.

This is an amazing functionality that saves time, allows you to have remote meetings on your own time and prevents your email from filling up.

Don't Suck at Email.

In the modern business world email is probably the number 1 communication tool. However, it is extremely easy for email to turn into a mess that sucks up too much time. I have worked remotely for nearly a decade and in that time I have learned (and am still learning) that like any tool email is only as good as the person using it. Different people have different expectations when it comes to email and it needs to be used differently depending on the situation (especially when emailing clients or suppliers). Still I have compiled below a few email rules I have found really important when emailing co-workers and others within your company.

Rule #1 "Reply All" should be you default method of reply.
If someone sends you an email and CC's another person on it they are probably trying to start a group conversation (as if you were all in a room together). Therefore you should respond to everyone in the discussion unless there is a specific reason not to. Its very frustrating to try and start a group discussion then to get a bunch of individual responses.

Rule #2 Create group discussions
I can't tell you how often people have said "I told Jane to do this yesterday, I will check with her and get back to you". Why not just CC Jane on the reply and say. "I told Jane to do this yesterday. Jane, did you have a chance to get this done".  See how much more efficient that is? Look to do this every chance you get. It is totally fine to address two people in an email and kill two birds with one stone. See Below...

Hi guys,
Jane, were you able to call the supplier. Bob, after she calls the supplier and gets confirmation don't forget the order has to go out by 5pm.
- Jacob

Rule #3 Don't Go CC crazy. If you don't specifically name someone in an email then you probably should NOT cc them. Also if you do CC them you should issue to them a specific command or question. You should not just CC someone to "make them aware" unless there is a really good reason to do so - even then you probably should mention them saying something like "Jacob what are your thoughts?". If in doubt don't CC a person if you don't mention them in the email.


Rule #4 Emails are a way to get on the to do list. 
Most people are very busy and have a lot to remember already. Email is a way to have things written down so you don't forget. If a person tells me "send me that report tomorrow" by phone or in person there is a higher likelihood it will be forgotten. A quick email is much better as it does not require the mental energy to remember.

Rule #5 Keep it concise and focus on the command, or question.
Business emails should be concise. Nearly all emails are written to do one of the following...

1. Issue a command (aka ask/tell someone to do something)
2. Get information (aka ask a question)
3. Convey information (aka "FYI").

When reading an email you usually want to know what you need to do with it. Conveying information should be done as briefly as possible and the focus of the email should be on the command or question. A real pro will put the command or question at the bottom in a line of its own. Here is how.

Hi Bob,

Yesterday the supplier charged the wrong card and it caused a delay in the shipment. We have 4 customers waiting on orders. I worry we might lose them.

Can I proceed with shipping the material without payment?

Notice the first paragraph, the one with the backstory is short. Short and to the point is best. Teammates don't need a life story they need just enough info and then to know what action they need to take. Then the command or question is at the bottom where the reader can quickly find it.

Rule #6 Avoid FYI's
Any email that does not contain a question or a command is merely informational (an FYI). These should be limited as much as possible. Usually, if a person wants information they will ask for it (IE "Please let me know when you get those new advertisements up")

Rule #7 No need for meaningless replies. (unless asked for)
Sometimes people will email back "Thanks" or "Got it". While these are polite gestures they are not really needed. A sender should assume the recipient got and understands the email. If it is important the sender should put a command like "Let me know if you understand" or "Let me know when you get this".

Rule #8 Don't call or talk if you can email
Calling someone interrupts them. It is a way of barging into their world and saying I need you at this moment. Sometimes you might need them and it is important but if it can wait a 6-24 hours just email them.

Rule #9 Text if its urgent, but simple.
If you need to know the password to the wifi and are sitting waiting for it just text. Text is a way to say this is urgent but it can be taken care of quickly. Email would take too long and a phone call is not really needed for such a simple question.

Rule #10 Call if its urgent and complex 
Lets say you have a decision that needs to be made regarding an upset client that will require some brainstorming and figuring out from a manager and the decision needs to be made in the next hour or 2. This is the time for a phone call. Phone calls should be used to handle time sensitive matters that can't be resolved with a quick text message.

Rule #11 Use alternative methods of communication. 
There are some awesome tools out there to cut down the amount of emails you use.  Personally I love google docs/drive and their "comments" function. You can have amazing brainstorm sessions, meetings, and document collaboration without sending a million emails back and forth, completely remotely and on your own time.  

Rule #12 Don't read too much into tone.
When dating a person will read WAY to much into every word sent to them. In business try to avoid this. If I just say "yes" or "no" or fail to include a "Best wishes" at the bottom of my email I am not trying to be rude, I am trying to be efficient. Politeness should be exercised as much as possible but please realize that often when dealing with sometimes hundreds of emails you don't have time to write "best wishes" 100 times.